It’s sooooo hard for most of us to like our bodies (or not totally hate our bodies) after we have a baby. Even those blessed with amazing genes and tiny postpartum bodies are probably not loving them right after having a baby. Things aren’t the same. You’re bloated, stretched, swollen, have stretch marks and varicose veins and loose skin and c-section scars and enormous nursing breasts with big nipples. New mom body is tough no matter who you are. You feel frumpy, not yourself, and completely undesirable. It’s hard to find things to wear that you feel good in. It’s hard to feel good about yourself.
It took me until my third postpartum body to finally accept it. To realize that this is part of the beauty of motherhood and that my body is like this because I have grown three beautiful boys inside of it. It has done amazing things. And it deserves to be embraced for that. When you look in the mirror and see your stretch marks and your soft round tummy, remind yourself of all of that before you start your inner self-hate.
Solly Baby asked me to be part of their SS16 Lookbook back when Quincy was first born to represent that early postpartum stage. I immediately said yes — it wasn’t until the night before when I looked at myself in the mirror and realized that I would be showing up super sleep deprived with a 10 day postpartum body and hair that was desperately in need of highlights. And then I reminded myself why they wanted me, why I looked like that, and that I needed to embrace it. So that when other women were looking at photos and saw a mom wearing a newborn in a wrap, they would see themselves. It’s ok to look like shit for a while you guys. Let’s allow ourselves time to look and feel like shit, and when we do, remember that it won’t last forever and that we look like that for a really good reason and that it is ok to just embrace it. On that note, here is me, 10 days postpartum (with professional hair, makeup, and styling, of course).
When I look at these photos now, 4 months later, I don’t see how much I don’t like my weird postpartum hair or my still swollen face or the body bulges as much as I see that teeny Quincy. My body is still not where I want it — colic, reflux, sleep deprivation, cutting diary but surviving on carbs and sugar, not being able to exercise yet due to the colic, reflux, and sleep deprivation have all kept me from making much progress — but it’s ok. I’ll get there. I’m in survival mode still. I’m doing my best. I was a home to that teeny baby and have nourished him to a whopping 17 pounds in those 4 short months. So I’m trying hard to not dislike myself or put too much pressure on myself. To be forgiving of myself. We’ve earned at least that, haven’t we? Big thanks to Solly Baby for asking me to do this and to Max Wanger for taking such sweet photos of Quincy and me. And to the whole team there for making me feel pretty and comfortable at a time where when I was so not feeling either one.
I’d love to see you embrace and share your own postpartum body photos proudly on instagram with the hashtag #embraceyourmombod and #battlefieldmotherhood. Let’s start a movement!